D A N C E is my life.

People wonder why i'm always talking about dance, & why do I want to pursue this. One frequent question is, why haven't I put any of my work on YouTube ?

I got interested in dance around the age of 16, watching dance movies & watching the choreography in music videos. I was intrigued by this, and soon started mimicking videos. Although I was terrible, it was something that I knew I could possibly want to pursue. I didn't really get into dance until my junior year of high school, seeing some of my friends who were dancers dance, and even seeing strangers dance made me even more intrigued and inspired. I think the thing that pushed me to want to do this was my low self esteem. I had major issues with myself, my weight, the way I looked, & the way people labeled me as. I went to my first school dance in the 8th grade, and at first I was scared, but with the few friends I had, they encouraged me to not give a care and dance my ass off. I was bullied throughout middle school for being "girly & gay", I got picked on every single day. Those bullies were the same bullies that danced in the same room as me and they didn't judge me, so I took dance as something that I can run away to without being judged. That passion built up until my junior year and I finally started to train myself in dance. I couldn't go to dance classes or even join a dance crew because I had no job and I was scared to tell anyone that this was something that I wanted to do. What held me back was that I was scared that my parents would judge me and think it's a waste of time. So I looked on youtube for tutorials on how to learn 8 counts, and I learned a whole 8 count routine from YouTube which helped me learn about timing and precision. I took martial arts when I was younger and it is connected to dance because you have to discipline yourself and control your body. Putting those together I made myself. Learning from YouTube was a good experience, but I wanted to learn what my style is. That was when I decided to start freestyling to music and form a vision in my head of how I wanted the choreography to be. After about a year of freestyling my senior year of high school, I decided that I wanted to do the talent show, and form a dance crew. I formed the dance crew ( Untouchable Swagger ) with about 11 members, but they weren't as committed as me, and we fell apart quickly. I don't blame them, because it was something fun to them, but serious to me. I choreographed my first piece that was supposed to be my crews audition mix for the talent show ( Danity Kane - Damaged ), and I learned about visionary concept, form a picture in your head and envision yourself dancing and feel the music through your body.

Recently I started choreography to Britney Spears - Shattered Glass which is supposed to be my second piece, but I gave up on choreographing to it because I couldn't find a concept to it, I was simply just moving my body and throwing in different movements. I guess I just loved the song soo much, but couldn't see an image to it. Sometimes it's best to let things go and start on new ones. Currently I haven't found any new songs that form a vision in my head, but as soon as I do, I will choregraph to it and it will become my official second piece. This time I won't announce anything to anyone, because I don't know if I would give up on it, or whatever situation happens. I just want to get myself out there in the right way, I want to give a good first impression to the public.

After all these years of freestyle & self training, I think it's time to join a dance studio and learn from other choreographers. I found one studio that I will join soon, they teach Zumba & Hip Hop, and I am excited to finally get my foot in the path I need to be on.

Dancing is my passion and nobody will stop me from it. A couple of years from now, I'll make moves on the world, but for now, training is the only thing on my mind.

Rambling....

It's been a while since i've updated this blog, I don't know where to start. Let's backtrack a little bit.

Okay so this past week was my birthday ( I turned 19 ), realizing that i'm 19 now makes me realize that I haven't gone anywhere yet, I've pretty much been stuck on the same page. I have been practicing a lot on my dancing, & I think it's time that I got into a studio & started training. In order to do that I need a job first. I applied to Hollister on tuesday, and I had my interview on friday (my birthday). The interview went pretty well I think. I was pretty nervous since it was a group interview and you don't want to repeat anyones answers, so I had to think about my past experiences and put it to the best answer I can to the questions that were being thrown at me. One specific question about how diversity is important to me made me really think. I didn't have time to think for an answer so I basically said the basics of it on how it doesn't matter what race you are, everyone is equal and it shows especially in clothing that people can wear the same things, nothing for a specific ethnicity. I gave an example, & the manager is a white girl so I think I offended her a little when I said that an example would be that only white people work at hollister, but I responded to that statement saying that it wasn't true & that with diversity it shows that Hollister isn't just for white people. I hope she wasn't offended, I was telling the truth about the Hollister stereotype and I hope the manager saw that. After that the interview was over I went on and looked for my mom. That woman I swear does NOT stay in one place, I went through the mall at least 3 times looking for her.

While I was looking for my mom I bumped into my high school friend Mariah, Gosh how much I missed her. Talked to her and decided to walk her to her job upstairs at the movie theater. While walking there I saw this cute asian boy with a lip piercing walking by and I could not stop looking at him. I really wanted to "holla" (lol) and get his number but I was hella scared. Man, I will never let an opportunity like that pass by me ever again, even if he did reject me at least I could say that I tried. He was on my mind for the rest of the day. Damn, I really messed up and I probably won't ever see him again. Oh well... I guess.

I also applied to Victoria's Secret and they seem pretty interested in me. I think the fact that i'm gay played a big part in them being interested in me. I know they hire guys, but I think a lot of guys want to work there just to see other girls and be nasty lol. Soo, hopefully they will call me for an interview. I really wouldn't mind working there, I can give that store some excitement and females would feel comfortable around me, get a boys opinion if they needed it, without me getting horny or anything LOL hahaa, I love my men, couldn't see myself ever going for a female ever, I can't help the fact that I love the D.

I saw the Lady Gaga video for Alejandro & I honestly do not like the video. The choreography was amazing & I love the dancing, but the video itself was lacking Gaga. I feel like she went a little too dark this time & it didn't excite me like her previous music videos. I get the meaning of the video ( I don't feel like explaining ) but I didn't like it that much. Oh well...